Stillness

I recently read the article The Art of Staying Still, and it started me thinking. We moved to York 4 months ago with big plans of seeing the world, but really it was for school. School is the priority and anything else that happens is a wonderful plus!

Being still is not something I have ever been good at. I am a busy person. I like to look busy because I’m a people pleaser and because then at the end of the day I am tired and feel like I have accomplished a great deal. My family is a busy family. There was always a project going on around the house: gardening, starting a business, remodeling a house, always something to do. Then I went off to college and there was even more to do. I had a billion wonderful classes with a ton of work outside of them. I was performing and getting many great opportunities! -There was practicing and hanging out with friends, working two or three little part time jobs. THEN I met my husband. There was even less time in the day. I had all the stuff I had had before PLUS a really wonderful guy I just wanted to be with and get to know all the time. Then we got engaged and I planned a wedding, got married and set up house, all during my junior year of college. It was so worth all the busyness.  Every bit.

I graduated, we moved from Ohio to Texas with all our worldly possessions, planned the move to England and 4 months later we were living in York, walking around great Roman ruins and getting to know wonderful people.

Then things stopped. Life slowed down and it was just us. I didn’t have any distractions or commitments. John was in school, rehearsing, practicing, sitting in lectures, and I was still.

Stillness is a wonderful thing. It is a hard thing, but it is a wonderful thing. Stillness is a teacher. You can learn more about yourself in a day of stillness than in a week of busyness. How will you use your time, the time you have never had before? Will you pine for the busyness you had before? -Will you plan how busy you will be again? – or will you just live in the moment and embrace the stillness?

I did all of those things. Every one. In order. Then when the New Year began I suddenly felt content. Happy to be right where I was, to have the time to be a homemaker, to always be home with dinner ready when my husband came home. It is probably the last time I will get to live with such simplicity. Life moves really fast and sometimes stillness is a gift.

Psalm 46 (especially vs. 11) is a really comforting Psalm. It is about the Lord being OUR strong fortress and ending wars and bringing peace to the earth, and I have always felt like it was about wars within ourselves. For me the war is contentment. I am always planning ahead and not really living in the moment and not quite enjoying what I do have to it’s fullest. The command of “Be still, and know that I am God;…” reminds me that this momentary stillness was given to me and I must use it to the best of my ability.

This is a trust year. A still year. A very good year.